Let me repeat that. I am, in this very moment, the person I am meant to be. I do not need to change, correct or become. I am exactly where I need to be because I am Divine. My friend, Jean, puts it this way (I am paraphrasing her words). “Everything we can see and touch is a reflection of the Divine, created by the Divine so that she can see herself. Just like a mother, who wants the very best for her children, the Divine wants us to surpass her, to be happier, to have greater abundance, to be the greatest than her.”
We need only receive what the Divine is waiting so patiently to give us. We can and will have everything we want and need. Timing is everything. Spirituality is not a form of escape. We are “spiritual warriors” training not for battle, but to be courageous, to be radically alive in the midst of all that the world has to offer. Chogyam Trungpa, who brought Buddhist teachings from Tibet to the West, said, “There is no dry land; there is only fearlessness which is found in the heart.”
What lies at the center of my heart is what brought me into this world….a sense of wonder.
The peace and clarity that I so desperately seek is already within me. I have, for so long, repressed the very parts of me that have the power to free me. Under the label of depression, I have medicated and dulled the exuberance of my heart. Running in fear of rejection, I have suppressed my fearlessness because I believed my sadness and tears to be a curse. But this weekend, watching my son portray Marius in Les Miserable, the convulsions I experienced, emboldened me. I felt as thought I had expanded into the Universe and beyond. I loved the show. I loved everyone in the show even those who had been hateful to my son. I wanted to hug them, to tell them how wonderful they were. I loved San Francisco. I loved my life. I loved the world. I never felt bigger or more alive than in that moment when, outside the stage door, I clung to my son and my heart broke open.
Yeah. What I am sayin’.
Writing into the Light 