February 13-One Year, One Day at a Time-Impermanence

Watching the Olympics.  Amazing men’s free skating.  When I watch something like this, the effort, the work to train, the precision, I have a tendency to doubt myself.  Should I be working harder?  What is it that I am not doing that I should be doing?  Should, should, should.  My first yoga teacher, Felicity Green, told me that the root word of shoulder is should.  When I feel my shoulders creep up next to my  ears, I think of Felicity and I relax.

I am not responsible for the world. I am only responsible for the choices I make.  If I am being true to myself, I will make choices that align with my life’s purpose.  I am charisma and I bring healing light into the world.  As long as my light is burning brightly, I am living my dharma.  When I listen to my heart I create joy and I experience joy.  It is a communion between me and the world, me and my soul.

I watch my mind during the days, like this one, when i have only two private lessons.  Am I wasting my life?  Am I squandering the life I have been given when I spend an idle afternoon catching up on my shows…Downton Abbey and Chicago PD.  I TV an obstacle?  I don’t know.  What do I know?  I know I am a skillful life coach/therapist/yoga teacher.  I have a gift.  I help others to realize their greatest potential, to overcome long time obstacles, to thrive, to be fully engaged in life, to give to others because it is the only way to live.  To give not to be good, but because it is in our nature to do so.

Okay good.  What does this have to do with impermanence.  What I know is constantly changing.  I know what I know until I know more.  I am always growing, not because I want to be better or impress others.  I grow because I yearn for greater authenticity.  I want to be raw and real and, at the same time, able to laugh at myself and others.  We are all in this together.  “We’re all Bozos on the bus so we might as well sit back and enjoy the ride.”  Wavy Gravy  We never know what is going to happen next.  Can we breath in to what is, feel it as deeply as possible and be full present with ties to the past or fear of the future?  The answer is yes?  Do not give up on yourself or me.  One thing is certain, things are always in flux.  I may start as the Olympic favorite for the gold and finish in last place.  Every day is a new day.  There are no guarantees.  Show up and see what happens.

I signed up for two 7 day silent retreats at Upaya.  One in July and the other in December, 2014.  Will they challenge me?  Will i be scared and lonely?  Will I wish I had not come?  Yes to all three, but I will do it and I will learn more about who I am.  The more I know about myself the less likely I am to feel separate from you.  And after each 7 day retreat I will come home.  I will re-ënter my every day life.  Everything will change, but life will go one.  My feelings change, my perspectives change, and politics change.  I was a brunette and now I am gray-headed.  My children were young and now they are much older.  We live and eventually we die.  We are impermanent.  Why not enjoy it.  Allow the ever-changing world we live in to free you, to give you the uniqueness of this moment.  It is one of a kind.  Don’t miss it.

Union of Opposites

What is yoga. It is the union of opposites which actually means the end of duality.  Yoga is  freedom from suffering and freedom to thrive, to live life fully without fear.  How do we achieve this state of being?  Practice, practice, practice.  We learn through the practice of yoga, the asanas, meditation, pranayama, to observe ourselves and the world around us.  How do we relate to ourselves?  Do we judge, criticize, bicker, abuse and berate?  Are we considerate, loving, compassionate and open-minded?  Do we accept ourselves unconditionally?  Probably not.

How do we relate to the world in which we live?  Do we label events, pidgeon-holing them as good or bad.  Do we like and dislike, judge and reject, separating from people, places and ideas we do not agree with?  When we learn to observe, to see clearly what part we are playing in the game of life, we soon realize that we can either accept things as they are or we can adjust, make changes, move on, directing our energies and thoughts into more positive and constructive behavior.

Last night, we went out with friends.  I slept until 8 am.   When I awoke, I realized that I would not have time for all of my usual morning rituals so I chose the one I felt was most important to me.  I meditated.  I could have spent what little time I did have before teaching, going over the action of last night which led to me sleeping so late.  How would that have served me?  Being self-critical is certainly not the best way to pass the time of day.

In the Yoga Sutras, Patanjali makes it quite clear that everyone will eventually achieve the state of yoga.  Those who choose meditation as their path to enlightenment will proceed more quickly than those who solely practice devotion.  And those who work with the yamas and niyamas, focusing as I have mentioned on their relationships to themselves and the world, will be the slowest to experience the union of opposites.

Knowing that life is not an either or, a good or bad, a you or me, we can relax and practice being who we are in this moment.  We can observe our own behavior and the state of the world around us.  How are we doing?  Do we have good relationships or are we stuck in patterns of attachment or aversion?     Is there an element of joy and a sense of being deeply connected to the life you are living?  If so, continue on.  If not, perhaps there is an adjustment to be made.  Remember there are no mistakes….just lessons.

“We are all Bozos on the bus of life.”  Wavy Gravey